Cardiac Dancing

And so rolls out the summer! A very British summer. It is beautifully warm at the moment, stretching days full of sun and light. No more dragging around layers and layers of clothing on our commutes between classes, rehearsals, shows and auditions. We can move freely, just as we dance when we arrive at our individual destinations.

Summer is also a time of change - as the academic year comes to a close, thousands of new graduates will come leaping out of performing arts schools all across the globe. Charging the doors, eager to find the jobs they've been dreaming about since they started on day one at their respective training colleges. These graduates want jobs. They want work. They want to perform! Here it begins, for so many.

I was very aware as a training dancer that there were far, far more dancers out there than there will ever be jobs. Like most dancers, I feared the very real prospect of graduating and never actually being cast for anything. Therefore, venturing out to actually try to get work was a terrifying prospect! To try was  to chance failure - inviting the potential for rejection. A big step from the comforts of dance college and all its reassuring reports and feedback. But it was an inevitable next chapter. This I knew.

And so - over the Christmas break of my final year, I created a professional profile casting page with 'StarNow'. Over one evening, I uploaded a few photos, filled out a little bio, and watched my profile unfold before me. I then went on to apply for a few jobs that appealed to me at the time. And there it was. I closed my laptop, and took a very deep, shuddering  breath.

http://www.starnow.co.uk/helenvictoria

The rest of that academic year was a huge learning curve for me. Having created an account, I soon discovered what was missing, what was needed, and what was realistic. I realised very swiftly that without a show reel or professional photos I wouldn't even get a response. After I had uploaded these ingredients, I began to realise that my CV was very short compared to other users of the site. And so I began to fill my weekends teaching at local schools for free, doing small scale photo shoots, and performing at every opportunity - paid or otherwise.

Bit by bit, I worked my way forwards. I applied for work every day of the week, checking my iPhone all day long between training classes. I hassled and badgered as many employers as possible either for work or for constructive feedback if I wasn't selected - which was often! I began to flood social networking pages such as Twitter, Instagram and Facebook with details of my endeavours. I followed, and was surprised to find like minded followers wandering along behind me in the cyber system. And so it continued.

My year of enthusiastic rejection culminated in finally being invited to an audition just before I graduated, thanks to a StarNow job application. I was, thankfully, successful and it lead to being cast for the 7 month show contract in Marrakech, Morocco. I flew out within days of graduating, with an entirely new set of nerves!

That first flight, in both senses, was exactly a year ago now. A whole year. A huge amount of time in anyone's life. Since returning from my dancing chapters in North Africa, I have been fortunate (and persistent!) enough to have worked within every week I have been back. Collections of heartbeats, passing by in one singular drumbeat. 

But the heartbeats are why we do it, are they not? The nervous heartbeats, the thumping of blood flow all around our bodies when we are finally given the chance to truly dance. After all the applications have been sent, emails replied to, and auditions nervously attended, we must remember what it is we are working towards ultimately. It is the moments of rapid heartbeats that are the ones I live for and move us forwards. These are the moments that make my head and heart full of dizziness. Cardiac dancing!

Graduates, you are at your fittest and freshest. Go forth! Keep working on and up. It's OK that you didn't get that job, or were passed over in that audition. Because they are all steps that belong to you - they are your moments to collect, culminate and what what you wish of them. There are heartbeats waiting for you, I promise you.

I spent a very long time in a personal situation where I was contained and asked not to listen to the beats and rhythms of my heart, soul and mind. I was asked to quieten them down, to stay as plain and colourless as possible. But today, as I type, I am more than happy to celebrate every moment of rejection, disappointment, and dead ends. My blood, my sweat, my tears - they are my own. Your journey is yours, as mine is now.

Enjoy every moment. Listen to your own rhythms and heartbeats. Because this is, after all, what it is all for.

#StarNowBlogger

Helen Victoria

X.